GOD, LOOK AFTER THE FRIEND I’VE LOST TOUCH WITH.
His birthday's still on the phone. Once upon a time you would have called her immediately. Today you can entrust to God the good you wanted and what remains difficult.
The phone reminds you of his birthday. You knew that, actually. There are dates that remain even when a person is no longer part of our days. You can think of how he laughed one night, the way he understood a joke before you ended it.
Then the rest comes back. What you said, the message remained unanswered, or only the years that moved everything. Not all friendships end with a fight. Some of them become more shaved until one day you realize you don't know where to start again.
Maybe you want to write to her. Maybe today you'd rather not. You can pray for her without having already decided what the future of your relationship will be. The good you give them doesn't need an answer in the chat to be honest.
A Prayer to Bring a Name to God
In the catechesis of 16 December 2020, Francis spoke of the prayer of intercession as a way to bring before God the life of others, with their joys and difficulties. This form of prayer can also welcome a person with whom the relationship has changed.
The following words are an original composition of CHIARA!. You can change them, leave a part out, replace friends with the name in your heart. They are not a liturgical formula or a promise of reconciliation. I'm a space to try to actually.
Sir, today I came back to you.
Sir, I've got my friend back today. I still call it that, even though I haven't known his days for a long time. I don't know who you're having coffee with, what makes you laugh now, what thoughts you take home at night. You know his life, even in places I don't see anymore.
Thank you for what we shared. For the times I felt understood, for the simple things that were most beautiful with her, for the time when I felt natural. Help me remember that good with sincerity, without having to erase everything in order to move forward.
I entrust you with what still hurts me. The questions left open, the disappointment that comes back when I least expect it, the words I wanted to hear. I don't always know how to tell this distance without getting defensive. Also receive the confused part of my heart.
If I hurt your trust, help me recognize my responsibility. Give me clean words to apologize, without using them to get his forgiveness right away. If I've been hurt, help me seek peace and protection, with the time and support I need.
Take care of her, sir. Some people he loves, some fatigue he probably doesn't tell, some desires he's working on. Let him meet someone who is able to listen to her, who has company in difficult days and freedom to rejoice when something beautiful comes.
If there's room to talk to us again, help us do it with respect. To leave real questions, not to expect a meeting to fix everything, to recognize us for the people we have become. If our roads stay away, help me not to turn this distance into a war to continue within me.
Guard me, too, the desire to love that I sometimes hide for fear of being disappointed. Help me to receive the friendships present, to make room for those who will come, to ask no one to become the copy of what I miss.
I'll give you his name and mine today. The good lived, what we have not been able to guard, what we still cannot understand. Teach me a free and respectful way to love. Amen.
After prayer, you can respect the time you need
You might feel the desire to write a line. You can ask yourself what you want to tell her and how much space you're ready to leave to her answer, including the possibility that she won't get there. A wish can remain a wish, without carrying all the questions of recent years.
You might even notice that contacting her today would hurt you too much. You must not contradict this awareness to prove that you have prayed well. Your relationship with God can accompany you as you recognize what is possible and what still requires distance.
If friendship has been marked by manipulation or violence, protection remains necessary. A prayer for the good of the other person does not force you to reopen a contact. You can look for support and talk to someone trusted while you choose how to take care of yourself.
And if today only nostalgia remains, you can welcome it without turning it into a command. There are people who actually counted. You can recognize him, breathe, and go back to the relationships that today are asking for your presence. Even with that little tenderness left in her heart.
